Finding Spiritual Truth In A Crazed World - When We Don't Like Difficult

 
(28:00 minutes in length)
(PROPHETIC EXHORTATION AND WORDS OF KNOWLEDGE ARE NOT INCLUDED IN WRITTEN MESSAGE BUT DO CONTINUE IN THE AUDIO MESSAGE FORMAT BEGINNING AT AUDIO PLAYER TIME MARKER 21:38)
 
By Mary Lindow
The words, “The Harsh Winds of Life”  have been playing themselves over and over in my mind.
As I have pondered them and have allowed the Voice of the Holy Spirit to instruct me as to why I have been impressed with this statement, I sense the Lord addressing many deeper issues that are well anchored and maintained within our souls as believers.
 
HARSH WINDS
These blustery currents in the natural can be devastating to property, trees, and all living-breathing creatures. We have all seen what the devastation of hurricanes and tornadoes can do in a very short amount of time.
Often when listening to the traumatic stories of those who have lived through a nightmarish storm, the realities of what they hold near and dear have been laid bear and brought to the surface. Many weep over the loss of family photographs or tender things like Grandma’s old chipped china and are unconcerned about larger material items, but are deeply thankful for the safety of family members after a traumatic event. Others, are shaking fists at the sky and are enraged that they have been infringed upon during a difficult time, and want somebody else to pay for it!
 
THE HARSH WINDS OF LIFE BLOW UPON THE GODLY AND THE UNGODLY.  NO ONE IS EXEMPT.
There are some of life's storms that threaten to blow away everything we've depended on as well.
Friendships are tested, relationships are strained, and the Lord uses these harsh winds blowing against our lives to remove the crusty chaff that can form and harden around the seed of our lives.
Those who are independent in nature find a bitterness creeping into their attitudes and heart. They feel infringed upon when things are not easily controlled or maneuvered in their favor. And so, the Holy Spirit allows the winds to blow until a conviction penetrates the self centered soul, and exposes the fleshy comfort zone of, ‘My Way, My World, My Rights”!
"No man has power over the wind to contain it; 
So no one has power over the day of his death. 
And no one is discharged in time of war, 
So wickedness will not release those who practice it."
-Ecclesiastes 8:8
 
HOW LONG WILL THE HARSH WINDS BLOW?
As long as we practice wicked behavior in the eyes of the Lord, and no matter how hard we try, we cannot stop it! He is winnowing us, allowing us to be caught up into the refining wind of the Holy Spirit's conviction so that the chaff and waste places in our souls are removed.
And trust me my friends, anything that you may be hiding or pretending wasn’t “that bad”, that harmed someone else, well God will allow it to come to the light to be either judged or to be cleansed and yes, there may be consequences that you don’t like.
 
WE CAN’T HARM OTHER PEOPLE, OR ABUSE THEM, SEXUALLY PREY UPON THEM, SPIRITUALLY ABUSE AND DOMINATE OR SLANDER, and then pretend that it wasn’t “that big of a deal”! It’s a huge deal to God and he will continue to pursue us in order to cleanse us if we will allow him access.
(Yes you can say "ouch" right about now!)
 
CHAFF MUST BE REMOVED.  BUT WHY?
Chaff is a waste material plowed into the soil or burned.
Chaff, as a waste product from grain processing, shows us a symbolic use of the idea that refers to something seen as worthless.
Now, this is where we read, "to separate the wheat from the chaff" from
Matthew 3. It means to separate things of value from things of no value.
Another example is in Psalm 1 which says: "Not so the wicked! They are like chaff that the wind blows away".
 
WE CHRISTIANS OFTEN PRESUME THAT BECAUSE WE ARE REDEEMED THROUGH THE BEAUTIFUL SACRIFICE OF CHRIST FOR OUR LIVES, THAT WE HAVE AN OPPORTUNITY FOR AN EASIER AND MORE PRIVILEGED LIFE.
This is simply not so!
We are given a shield and a holy stamina to withstand the wiles of this world, but no free passes to a life of ease.
 
THE LORD LOVES ALL OF MANKIND.
He longs for ALL of mankind, (that includes you and I) to come to a place of trust in His way, not “our way”. Fully stripped of self-will, self-gratification, self- justification, and self-focus.
Matthew 5:45 says~
 “He causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good,
And sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous.”
 
I KNOW! I KNOW! THIS STINGS!
"But if you harbor bitter envy and selfish ambition in your hearts, do not boast about it or deny the truth." James 3:14
About now, I can hear a few righteous folks saying, "I would never boast about envy! "
Well! Selfish ambition is well hidden in our personal behaviors.
We offer gifts or opportunities for others to be blessed or helped as long as we are feeling in control and benevolent at the time of the offer or good intention.
But when the winds of life shift and the Lord allows the chaff of "waste materials" in our soul to be Tornadoed —bitterness and exclusive rights abound! Huffiness, abrupt harshness and passive aggression (which means getting even) will manifest and expose the soul's clinging nature, which does not want the hand of God striping away any safety veneer that we use to protect our approach to life.
 
A CHANGE IN THE SPIRITUAL CLIMATE HAS OCCURRED!
John 6:18 says, “A strong wind was blowing and the waters grew rough.”
Jesus allowed the wind to be a teaching point for his disciples.
They had walked with Him, talked with Him and served alongside Him. But trusting Him when the Storms and Harsh winds blew revealed a weakness that we all must look at, and often.
We trust the Lord when things are going our way, but when the Harshness of a storm blows us off the course that we set, many times we run to our own devices or “Plan B”.
 
SO MANY AT THIS TIME IN THIS DIFFICULT AGE ARE SCREAMING,
“Lord! Don’t you care about me? The winds are blowing, and I am fearful for my life! If you Love me, why are you allowing this horrid event to occur?”
Even Peter in his zeal to get out of the boat and see if it was indeed Jesus calling to him to come, once he was out of the safety of his own control and the winds blew against him, he focused on the wind, and not upon Jesus, who was there the whole time. Peter cries out, "LORD I am perishing! SAVE ME!”
 
CONTROL IS A DEEP, DEEP NEED.
Perhaps THE deepest need people have, is for control.
When we feel out of control, we experience a powerful and uncomfortable tension between the need for control and the evidence of “inadequate control”.
Without the Presence of God in our lives, we will attempt to control everything, every event, and every person around us in order to attain the sense of order and “identity power” that we crave.
 
DRAWING NEAR TO GOD
It was James, the brother of Jesus, who wrote to the believers in Jerusalem, "Draw near to God, and He will draw near to you. Cleanse your hands, sinners, and purify your hearts, you double- minded people!" (James 4:8).
If we draw near to God, he will respond and draw near to us.
Drawing near to God is spending time with Him, worshiping Him, praying and talking to Him, inviting Him into every aspect of our lives.
EVERY.  PART.  OF.  OUR.  LIFE.
 
BRING YOUR HEART UNDER HIS LORDSHIP
James gives us the blueprint for drawing near or “right up close” to the Lord. 
If you've committed sin, confess it, get rid of it.
Next, ask the Lord to examine your heart, your motives, and the things that make you do what you do.
 
Bring your heart under His Lordship as well.
May our actions be manifestations of a clean heart and conscience.
Allow HIM to remove the Chaff, the wasted time controlling things, and TRUST Him to align your life.
Notice that when he writes about this he says,
"Purify your hearts, double-minded people."
 
WHAT DOES HE MEAN BY "DOUBLE-MINDED"?
Well, a person who is double-minded is drawn in two completely different directions. And so he or she will get nowhere fast because loyalty is divided.
They will vacillate between faith and unbelief.
And, a double-minded person is unstable in all his/her ways and his/her spiritual walk is inconsistent because he/she tries to serve God and his/her own interests, and gamble their life against the Harsh Winds.
We've all learned that this kind of living never works. 
 
YOU CANNOT SERVE TWO MASTERS.
Friends again I say this under the anointing of the Holy Spirit, the master that you serve whether it be hiding something that is a secret sin or offense to The Lord, or things that you are aware of that have dishonored others, they will be brought into the light one way or the other.
If you think you can hide it, if you think you can gloss it over, God will eventually bring it into the light and have you exposed for deception.
Or, you choose to get the help you need and you can humble yourself! Yes, there may be consequences you don’t like, because of your actions and choices.
But repentance and accountability will save your soul. It may not save your marriage, it may not save your ministry, and it may not save your job or your relationships. But it will save your soul, because humility enters, and God can re-create what has been destroyed and damaged.
 
GOD DOESN'T PLAY GAMES!
No one is going to get very far with God by playing spiritual games.
It will soon be discovered that the only people playing the game with you will be you, yourself, and again, YOU.  It's just like people thinking that they can "ride the fence" into the kingdom.
There is no riding the fence; there is no lukewarm support group.
You’re either in or out.
If we really want to know Him, we are going to have to get serious about our relationship with Him.
 
WE DON’T WANT DIFFICULT! 
I will tell you right now, that even as I write and speak these words, I can feel the resistance to pruning and more change in my gut!  
Are you in a pruning, shocking, "getting trimmed back" difficult season right now? 
Most everyone is! 
Feeling like your wings have been clipped?
Are you seeing a pattern of lethargy and a dullness of joy maybe in your daily life? 
Don’t waste those struggles friends! Know that God is very... VERY... intentional. And, He has a good plan for all of it. 
Every challenge is an opportunity to practice walking one day at a time, with really clear thinking and gratitude, and He is right there, inside you, to help you.
 
LIKE I SAID BEFORE! WE DON’T WANT DIFFICULT! 
But my oh my, I do want to be like Him!
So I’m in surrender-mode now, friends. 
I’m saying, “Cut away, Lord. Go deep.” 
WHY? Because I want ALL that He has for me. 
I want the fruit. 
I want all that abundance, and I know it’s waiting for me when this weird and awkward season changes.
 
THERE IS ANOTHER PHENOMENON I FIND THAT HAPPENS DURING THE PROCESS, WHEN THE HARSH WINDS OF LIFE ARE BEARING DOWN.
And, one that I find that is unhealthy to ignore.
The enemy of our soul is observing and is feverishly “taking notes” about this difficult process, and I believe he finds it quite enjoyable; he laughs and ridicules and flings missiles of insults that shout that, "only a loser needs this kind of difficult adjustment ”. 
This of course, is a lie but, one which we can tend to believed on a bad day! Listening to the wrong voice can tempt us to believe the blowing away of chaff in our lives is punishment, and comes from God being mad at us. 
It can cause us to pull back from deeper fellowship or social engagements (social distancing tools too, like Face Time, ZOOM, integral) these paralyze honesty, transparency and humility.
It can lead to self-hatred, self-protection, denial about how we hurt others with half-truths, and so on!
 
I AM TRULY BECOMING MORE AWARE IN MY SPIRIT THAT GOD CAN ONLY USE ME—OR “BEST USE ME”, THROUGH THE PARTNERSHIP OF HIS POWER AND MY WEAKNESS. 
 
A wise and well-tested man by the name of Alan Hood must have had a few pruning clippers dig into his life at time or two and learned this lesson. He stated, 
“To Be Pruned Is To Lose The Resources, Whether Monies or Physical Strengths Upon Which Everyone Around You Measures You As Successful.”
LET’S READ THAT AGAIN…     
…S  L  O  W  L  Y ! 
 
“To Be Pruned Is To Lose The Resources, Whether Monies or Physical Strengths Upon Which Everyone Around You Measures You As Successful.”
 
TRYING TO USE OLD THINGS WHEN GOD IS TRYING TO GIVE US NEW THINGS IS REALLY SUCH FOOLISHNESS! 
Psalm 85 talks about Restoration, Re-tooling and Revival.
Verse 8 says, 
“I will listen to what God the Lord says;
He promises peace to his people, His saints
—but let them not return to folly.”
 
I’M TRUSTING THE LORD’S GOOD AND GRACIOUS HAND IN THE PROCESS THAT THE WORLD IS EXPERIENCING RIGHT NOW. 
I know God does not intend to leave even a healthy fruit-bearing branch how it is, but He is always after a more abundant harvest for His people.
I don’t get it, I don’t like or want difficult! 
But I also don’t want a puny little sick looking basket of bitter, green, unusable fruit out of life! 
He will “give the increase” when I reach the end of this seeming devastation of stymied ideas and “put on hold” plans, and let me tell you something crazy, I feel it coming!  The increase!
I’m learning to WALK in harmony, in tune with the truth that, “He is dwelling like healthy sap, in me, and will keep sin and despair from having dominion over my life”. (Romans 6:14) YOUR LIFE TOO! 
 
A MOMENT IN HIS ANGER - A LIFETIME IN HIS FAVOR.
God disciplines for a moment when He wishes to get our attention and our lives may indeed become painful for a period, but then comes His favor.
God doesn't delight in either our depression or our damage. 
And, when He begins to deal with the chaff in our lives, it is for our advantage, that we may be conformed to His likeness and reflect His holiness.
When we sense God’s disapproval, when it appears He has withdrawn from us, it is only so that we see our utter need of Him.
 
WHEN LIFE SEEMS TO BE SO SOUR, WHEN EVERYTHING CRUMBLES, then we must remember what we “say we believe”, that God’s favor is with us, because of Christ’s worthiness given to us, because we are adopted and are His - which means, that His favor always wins out over His disapproval.
 
THIS PICTURE IS PAINTED WELL BY THE WORDS "WEEPING REMAINS FOR A NIGHT." 
Weeping and sorrow are pictured as a traveler who comes to stay for a night. The pain and sorrow we feel may seem as though it has moved in with us like an unwelcome guest, who decides to stay for a very long time.
 
REJOICING THOUGH, COMES IN THE MORNING.
Your “mourning”, will dissipate in the morning”.
Your winter, will melt into summer.
God will replace your sighing, with singing.
Grief, will give way to gladness.
What was once bitter, will be made sweet.
And, what was once a desolate wilderness, will be transformed into a paradise.
 
LIKE THE FIRST RAYS OF THE SUNRISE WHICH DISPEL THE HARSH WINDS AND GLOOM OF NIGHT, 
GOD GIVES US JOY WHEN THE DARKNESS OF OUR PROBLEMS SEEM AS THOUGH THEY’LL NEVER LEAVE.
 
YOUR CROSS IS HIS GLORY
What is so crucial to understand is that as a Christian, your life will be filled with times of weakness and strength, with want and wealth, with disgrace and honor, with crosses and comforts, miseries and mercies, joys and sorrows, delight and mourning.
As this cycle of separating “Chaff” from our lives reoccurs many times in our lives, and it moves us from the cross to glory.
For your own health and so that you find all your satisfaction in Christ alone, God will send you times of great growth and other times of emptiness.
When the harsh winds blow, know that God desires that you find your hope and comfort by His own fire.
When the balmy breezes come, give Him praise and thanksgiving for the warmth He provides.
Psalm 57:1 says,
"Have mercy on me, O God,
Have mercy on me, for in you my soul takes refuge.
I will take refuge in the shadow of your wings until the disaster has passed.”
 
(PROPHETIC EXHORTATION AND WORDS OF KNOWLEDGE NOT INCLUDED IN WRITTEN MESSAGE CONTINUE IN THE AUDIO MESSAGE FORMAT BEGINING AT AUDIO PLAYER TIME MARKER 21:38)
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Copyright 2025 " THE MESSENGER "  - "THE ADVOCATE OF HOPE"
~ Mary Lindow
www.marylindow.com
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Brokenness – Disillusionment, and Redemptive Growth – The Raw Truth About Loss - Grief – Betrayal, and Maturity

 
By Mary Lindow
As you settle in to listen to this podcast, maybe you’re facing difficult times and you wonder how God can still have a plan for your messy, hurting, perhaps disillusioned life. What about your loved ones, or those in the neighborhood around you? There’s so much brokenness that it can feel like anything you do to help is like a drop in the ocean.
I certainly have had several moments this past season, months, days even, of being broken, disillusioned, angry, all the emotions that can go with hearing terrible stories of betrayal, clergy abuse, child abuse, adult children being estranged from parents, parents being estranged from their adult children, walking many from sadness over deep wounds from past relationships, festering with anger, guilt and shame.
This service of working with broken people that God has called us to, (and me specifically these past couple of years as a Biblical pastoral Counselor), well, seeing and hearing the sadness, can wear you thin at times, and I go running to the feet of Christ over and over again, asking him to make sense of how humanity can be so vicious and destroy one another.
Of course Jesus came to die for all of us, and in fact was broken, beaten, bruised and yes, he wept. So He knows the anguish and grief that can tow us under! The Lord has always been close to those who are crushed and broken, right from the very start.
 
Brokenness Doesn’t Distract Or Hinder God.
He extends endless compassion and love to us, even when we are feeling absolutely crushed.
When we don’t want anyone to see our brokenness, our shame, He is always close, never with judgment but always with kindness. The kind of kindness that heals.
The question is:
“Does brokenness have any purpose?”
Or is it a hindrance to God’s plans and promises?
Can God Turn Our Brokenness Into Something Beautiful?
 
In Matthew 26, Jesus had His last meal with the disciples before He went to suffer on the cross.
Now, even though I’ve read this passage many times, something rich recently stood out.
“As they were eating, Jesus took bread, blessed and broke it, gave it to the disciples, and said, ‘Take and eat it; this is my body’. (Matthew 26:26).
First, Jesus took the bread,
Then He blessed it,
And then He broke it.
 
Now, I thought to myself … “Why would He not first take the bread, break it and then bless it?”
 
There’s A Purpose To Why Jesus Did It This Way.
The blessing comes before the breaking, because this was the theme of Jesus’ life:
Jesus was blessed by the Father and the Spirit during His baptism (Matthew 3:16-17).
Jesus endured the brokenness on the cross (Luke 23:26-39).
And, Jesus conquered death through His resurrection and then ascended to the right hand of the Father.
This is the greatest blessing for believers because we are united with Christ and fully restored to God!  (Ephesians 1:20; Ephesians 2:4-6).
 
Blessed
Then Broken
Then Blessed again.
That's the pattern.
 
Maybe You’re In A Season Where You Feel More Broken Than Blessed.
I understand. But because God has blessed us with His Son, every ounce of brokenness we experience on this side of eternity is pointing us toward the blessing of heaven, where we will be reunited with Christ, if we trust in Him.
God also redeems our current brokenness as a means of blessing others who are also broken (2 Corinthians 1:4).
We Can Know With Confidence
That When We Endure Brokenness And Pain,
There Isn’t An Ounce Of Our Brokenness
That Is Not Under The Blessing Of God!
 
This Is A Hard Truth To Grasp. It may even be something we want to reject because it feels unfair or even cruel!
I agree that it can feel that way. Even Jesus Himself agrees. Just a few verses after the Last Supper, He prayed in the garden of Gethsemane and cried out, “I am deeply grieved to the point of death” (Matthew 26:38a, CSB).
We don’t have to dismiss our feelings when it comes to our brokenness. Even Jesus felt the full range of His emotions before His most broken moment.
We can come before God in humility with our raw, honest emotions. We can bring our brokenness to Him. We can trust that Jesus is with us, NOW. And, we can look to the cross and the empty tomb, knowing that though we experience brokenness, Jesus overcame it.
 
Brokenness Isn’t The End For Us.
Blessed, then broken, then blessed again.
Lord, give us the grace to endure this reality.
 
I don’t think it’s a coincidence that Jesus, who was blameless and pure, had scars that remained after his resurrection. Jesus’ scars were not a flaw. They’re a reminder that even the Savior of the world has experienced brokenness. They also give us a tangible answer to our doubts, like they did for Thomas. In a moment of faithlessness, doubt and brokenness, God meets Thomas with compassion and kindness.
Jesus’ Scars Are A Demonstration Of The Lengths He Went To For Us, a sacrifice given to restore hope in a broken world full of broken people.
And the same hands that were nail-scarred? They have our very names written on them as a promise that God will not ever forget or forsake us (Isaiah 49:16). Just like a scar, they’re permanently written as a reminder of God’s commitment to us, no matter how broken we feel.
 
Very Few See This Bleak Moment For What It Really Is.     
It's a chance to see their need for something that is beyond themselves. But my friend, this can be a moment where the soul can cross over from its own empty silence, into an expected quiet that is alive with His presence.
It silences the anguish, the anxious restlessness into a calm and still place of peace. It's as if the soul finds that in this dark place, there is a secret well of sweet water, and it springs up and overflows with light and life. 
 
LEARNING TO PASS INTO THIS
PLACE OF THE SPIRIT AND ALLOWING GOD
TO KEEP YOUR SOUL IN REFRESHING
SILENT TRANQUILITY IS A TRUE ACT
OF THE MATURING BELIEVER.
 
God Put You On Earth In Your Exact Place For His Specific Purpose, and you are living in that purpose, even when you don't know it.
Your soul may be grumbling and resisting, but you are living the story that God is ready to reveal to you. God is a lot bigger than you expect Him to be.
He's a lot bigger than your circumstances.
He is a God of detail.
He is deeply involved in the small details of your life, but He has a "bigger yes" for you.
Your true glory is the revelation of His splendor, his amazing ability to create redemptive “Resurrection moments” revealed in you day by day.
 
In 1 Peter 1:6. It says,  "In this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while you may have had to suffer grief in all kinds of trials."
 
As Jesus Is Revealed In You,
You Can Rejoice No Matter What.
 
The Display Of His Glory Often Comes Through Your Wounds.
Your dark nights and cries of longing are lovingly heard, and as His bright light dawns, your grief contrasts with His glorious joy.
In brokenness, God works in you something beautiful, deep, and solid to offer others. You are developing inner strength as you are being blessed, broken, and given as an offering in your trials. True strength comes from your desperate need of God. You are a joy to Him as you offer yourself as a representative of His sufficiency.
Paul said He wanted to know Christ and be conformed to the fellowship of sharing His sufferings, knowing there's a resurrection coming. (Phil. 3:10).
 
Know that your Father created you for this time, for these very circumstances. He knew exactly what would be happening in your life as you are living it right now. He knows the impact for which He is preparing you, that still awaits you.
Be Filled with his Grace and hope to lean into the purpose that you were create for, in spite of difficult people, through hard circumstances, and through tough challenges.
 
Your Purpose, My Purpose Is In The Process.
We won't get there overnight.
We won't mysteriously wake up with it one morning.
But today we are closer than yesterday, and tomorrow we will be closer than we are today.
Be at peace in Him to know these things, and rejoice in Him.
HE IS ALIVE! We Are Not Alone.
 
Let’s Pray Together,
Dear Lord,
Sometimes I feel overwhelmed by how painful earthly brokenness can feel. Please help us, help me remember that you Jesus are our greatest blessing.
You are with us now with me now, as we face hardship and grief and sadness and await a day when you will make all things new. Give me strength, give those that are listening strength as we long for this day, and we ask this in the name of the Resurrected King of Heaven, Jesus Christ, The Messiah.
Amen.
 
I Know That Many Of You Are Going Through Many Things In Your Own Lives and there is so much going on around us everywhere right now as the Lord is more than shaking his church. He is exposing so many uncomfortable things, but what he is really doing is bringing his people back to a place to where HE alone is enough, his word alone is light and life, strength and guidance, no matter how difficult or dark the times can be. His word will penetrate past all of that panic and bring us daily comfort.
I’d like to call it daily bread since we’re on the subject of talking about bread, and remember because Christ was the bread of life and he gave it to us, and since we’ve given our lives to him, we are now bread of life to others with whatever we speak out of our mouth in the name of Jesus.
It has to be in accuracy and mimicking the way he lived and walked. If it isn’t, then there’s going to be difficulty there’s going to be pain.
It’s going to cause pain.
It’s going to cause difficulty.
 
So I Encourage You, If You’re Running And Hiding or if you’re trying to protect yourself from something that you’ve done that you know needs to come out into the light,run to Jesus, then tell the truth and get the help that you need. It won’t be easy, but that clawing horrible feeling of waiting for the shoe to drop will end, and the enemy will no longer have a foothold in your mind.
For Those That Are Suffering Because Of The Behaviors Of Others and you know that there just doesn’t seem to be an answer or an end in sigth, and certainly no vindication. I encourage you to not back away and to stand where God has you, but don’t grow bitter and don’t look for revenge. This is when we take it back into our own power at our own strength.
I Bless You Today!
I encourage you to get before the Lord and ask him to show you “the way” that he has for you during these times where he is maturing you, maturing his bride, and it is all for the glory of the ONE who laid down that entire greatness so that we would have an access to return to heaven.
 
Duplication and sharing of this writing is welcomed, as long as the complete message, website, podcast link and information for Mary Lindow is included.
Thank You!
2025
"THE MESSENGER"  - Mary Lindow
www.marylindow.com
www.marylindow.podbean.com
 
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"DISCERNMENT vs. SUSPICION" - Telling The Truth About Abuse and Wolves In Leadership Positions

 
By Mary Lindow 
 
I’m going to make a few statements about this podcast before I begin.
I hope I am not required by Lord to make many podcasts like this one, but I will obey him if he does ask me to do so!  To even things out a little bit, my next few podcasts are going to be sharing about some magnificent and overwhelming experiences that I have had in meeting First Native Chiefs throughout the United States and Canada.
All of these events were orchestrated by the Lord in order for us to meet. The things that I learned from these godly individuals who love Jesus, but understand the strongholds in our cities, our nations and upon our lands, has been absolutely Life-changing. I hope to share at least two podcasts telling you these stories and experiences that glorify Jesus, and show the power of his supernatural ability to get us to the places we need to go without ever having to push our way in or manipulate anything.
 
Now let’s begin today’s crucial podcast.
We are in a time when many people are seeing much evil take place, not only in our nation, not only in large and small corporations, but in church organizations and organizations that claim to bear the name of Christ on their letterheads.
 
One of the greatest deceptions taking place is that people are being told to NOT “discuss”/not to tell the truth about the abuses that are taking place in some of these organizations.
With the multitude of public exposures that is taking place right now all over social media regarding unconscionable and difficult happenings, I have been agonizingly yet strongly prompted by the Holy Spirit, to share my thoughts and the experiences that I have had in walking other people out of dark places, because of the harm done to them in some of these institutions.
 
I do this with a heavy heart, and yet I must take courage and be obedient in order to be an “Advocate of Hope” for those who feel that they cannot speak out for fear of being threatened or ridiculed, letting them know that there are others who will champion and stand with  them by calling “wolfish abuse” what it is, instead of sweeping it under any kind of Church Carpet, Corporate Carpet, or Institutional Carpet.
 
I am by far, not the perfect believer by any means!
I’ve had some wonderful mentors and training from others in ministry as well as in the counseling arena who have been strong and good people of discernment.
When something inside of you is alerted or feels really uncomfortable, or even just the thought of, “there’s something not right about that” pops in, that’s a built-in radar God gives us.
Now, if someone’s judging someone because they don’t like that they’re loud, or seem to be "too meek, obese, skinny, or speak a truth that they aren’t comfortable with or don’t have wisdom about", then that’s where all the speculating and suspicion move in.
 
Being set free from critical behavior and suspicion takes a willingness to admit that we don’t trust anybody, or, that we think we have an exclusive lead on how God speaks all the time.
 
I certainly need the accountability friends in my life
who speak truth to me firmly and regularly!
 
The soul loves to put itself in its own place of authority and override discernment, humility,and often the need to prove that our opinion matters. Honestly, keeping a heart pure and clean before the Lord every day, (and that’s truly not just an easy thing), but pursuing him with the right heart, keeps that place where we hear from him very sharpened and aware!
Studying his word, digging into what it really means, provides a depth and place of resource to go to, to check whether our heart is in accordance with his word or if we’re making up our own ideas about things.
It’s so easy to let other people think or speak for us, or their opinions, being strong, driving a message to us that says we should probably do what they say. This is where we get into trouble!
 
We are supposed to question or “test” things
and not just take everything hook, line, and sinker!
 
In 1 Thessalonians 5:19-22 it tells us,
“Do not quench the Spirit.  Do not despise prophecies,
BUT, test everything; hold fast to what is good.
Abstain from every form of evil.”
 
Friends! Evil can be deceptive and cunning!
The word of God has an omnipotent power that cuts through all of the fog of self-deception and definitely pontificating! Many people quote the scripture and use it to their benefit when they want to self promote or appear to be somewhat spiritual. This is where discernment has to come in!!!
 
If something feels wrong, if something is spiritually off key, is not in alignment with what Jesus said or what the scriptures speak, then discernment has to come in to play.
 
The road gets narrower as you walk your Christian journey with Jesus, and you absolutely will be called many names because of the stance of wanting to be more like him, and more detached from the volumes of worldly knowledge.
Wisdom isn’t easily gained!  But, it’s so worth it when you get a little nugget that lasts for eternity.
 
Suspicion vs. Discernment.
I’ve seen this destroy and have been painfully more than a few times, a recipient of ugly and ruthless “suspicious” judgments.
Suspicion destroys relationships.
It destroys lives.
It listens to hearsay rather than God’s inward warnings.
Suspicion can feed a self satisfaction (which is actually pride) when our choices to put others in a lesser and suspicious light, even sabotaging them, justifies our own agendas.
 
When we are constantly suspicious of the motives of others, we drive people away that could be a great blessings to us. (They may even walk with a bit of a limp due to the battles and hard fought victories they’ve fought throughout their lives.)
Check your life today.
Are you discerning, or merely suspicious?
The problem is, sometimes we label suspicion with the pious name of “discernment” and think we're being super spiritual.
It’s so important to learn the difference between discernment and suspicion!  
 
The difference is quite simple.
Discernment comes from God and will recognize evil for what it is.
Suspicion come from or soul and will imagine evil when there is none.
If you see genuine compassion, kindness, mercy, accountability, humility and a forgiving nature in someone, you are seeing a surrendered soul.  
 
Not many want to talk about how hard spiritual growth and dying to ourselves, our opinions our interpretations is.
It's not a one time thing, it's every day.
It's remaining quiet when we want to speak.
It's trusting God's timing when we would, rather control.
It's doing it God's way when it doesn't make sense to us.
It’s quietly walking away from what might “appear to be a lucrative or more publicly promoting opportunity” when you know there are political or spiritually abusive environments involved.
 
We don’t get a lot of accolades or crowns here on earth for that kind of brave but necessary decision. But in heaven, when we do behold the face of the one who literally bled out for us, and he says, “Well done, so well done my good and faithful servant! Enter into my rest!” Oh my goodness, how absolutely all of the hardship and persecution will melt away in that moment, and the joy that is unspeakable and has yet to be fully understood, will be complete in our lives.
 
It is necessary in life to learn from those
who have more wisdom and experience,
because they can help us see things that we don't notice.
 
Even though modern culture tells us that we should “live our own truth and do whatever we think is best”, it’s this type of thinking that leads us into trouble. This is why Scripture tells us not to be wise in our own eyes.
 
True wisdom comes from fearing God. This means we should have a high regard for God's Word and His instructions to us. He knows all things, including, what is best for us.
We can also gain wisdom from other people. When we can learn from the mistakes and experiences of others, we're better equipped to not make the same mistakes. However, if you think you're the only one who knows best, you are bound to repeat the same errors.
 
There’s a huge amount of exposure taking place in pulpits, Ministry organizations, Christian Media Corporations, Governments, Christian Universities and Bible Schools...
...Right now.
 
Of course, we all know the Lord is doing a lot of the exposing and dealing with painful and shocking events that have or, are currently occurring, or are being investigated.
 
Why is he doing this? Because he will not allow these kinds of charades, criminal acts or hiding of sexual misconductsto NOT be caught.
Sadly many individuals who are sitting in church pulpits or are serving in ministry environments such as youth ministries, children’s church, Young adult groups and more, are often made uncomfortable by things they see taking place with some of the staff members.
The big question now is do you dare say anything?
 
If you see a male individual in a place of authority as a teacher, a pastor, any kind of youth worker anywhere, being over familiar with females, and by that I mean, resting their hand on their back too often with letting it linger, standing too closely to them in their personal space, spending time alone with them in their office etc. with doors shut and no visible way to see anything taking place. These are red flags!
A little bit of investigating and watching and taking notes is appropriate. Always document things that you see that make you feel there is something wrong going on and always date it. But be honest, not suspicious and don’t exaggerate or embellish. If necessary, take pictures. These are now used as evidence in court cases.
 
Another example!
If you would happen to know that there was a youth minister who sexually approached or interfered with a child or a young adult, and it was hidden and “dealt with” in an internal investigation among elders or leaders of a church or youth organization, club or scouting group, but was never reported, and this individual was then packed up and sent off to another state to minister or workelsewhere, they have basically turned this person into a repeat offender. These things must be reported to the police!
 
Here’s the hard thing.
We sure hope that we could go to people like elders or other leaders in the church if we see something taking place and know that deception is involvedand that others are covering it up.
If there has ever been a question that you have seen or a child has reported to you, that a young adult has reported to you or a teenager has reported to you that something inappropriate, whether it was conversation, whether it was physical touch, whether it was a threat that took place, you must go to the police.
 
Taking it to the pastor or taking it to the leadership "feels" like a good idea. But when there’s a wolf in the crowd, when there are wolves in leadership positions, we don’t take time to try to defend ourselves against wolves or predators. 
 
If you know, for a fact that these things have taken place, you must document and you must protect the children. You must protect the young developing adults. And, you must protect the future generations that would be affected if this perpetrator is permitted to be allowed to continue to remain in any organization, and not have appropriate legal consequences take place.
 
There are many who are holding positions in churches that are hiding inappropriate events of their own, within their own staff, or within their own organization, who value their building, their notoriety and their income, more than they value protecting the sheep or telling the truth.
 
Some people do not believe this is true! They think that surely the Holy Spirit would be exposing these things if they were really happening!
Well, my friends, the Holy Spirit uses practical human beings who are aware and have cultivated discernment and see that there is something very wrong and very out of order going on, and these human beings must be bold, courageous, and speak out like the prophet Nathan spoke to King David when he was having a long-term affair with Bathsheba and murdered his own military leader in order to cover his own manipulative and adulterous behavior.
There were terrible, painful consequences that took place because of what David did. Yet God in his mercy when David repented, restored David’s relationship back to himself.
But if forever changed David, and there were things that he was no longer permitted to partake in because of his wickedness.
But God did not shun him.
God corrected him.
 
Here are a few basic recommendations I’d like to share as a Pastoral counselor (and as a minister myself), with those who are in some form of ministry.
It’s not wise for men to counsel Women alone, but if necessary they must have a glass window where another safe office or staff member can see into the room. I have seen too many people get enmeshed emotionally with intimate counseling and I have historical documents that sadly indicate where several ministers who fantasized or planned or, actually have run off with people they were counseling for marriage difficulties! They have devastated marriages, families and churches because they crossed a line and blew clear past healthy boundaries, and safety protocols for counseling.
 
I also strongly recommend that men are not often alone in an office setting or ministry facility with women, especially if single, because they’re vulnerable women, because the table can turn two ways. The woman can become needy or manipulative and play on the affections or the emotions of a tender, kind hearted man, and then turn around and accuse them of some kind of inappropriate actions.
Men in buildings alone with women who are married and it’s late at night with a woman who is beautiful and lovely, or even sweet and precious, can create a sense of desire in a man whois tired of the grind of life, maybe hard work, might be having some strain at home, and in a few moments of weakness, begins to pursue an emotional affair, talking too openly, sharing too openly, and it can quickly lead to other kinds of affection, emotional bonding and inappropriate touching.
 
I know some of this sounds pretty heavy, and we as believers just don’t want to have to hear about the horrible, dark things that could possibly take place! We so want to believe the best in everyone and we want to be merciful and forgiving!
But, with the recent rash and exposure of well-known names, seemingly appearing holy and virtuous, many well protected individuals are now being exposed in multiple areas and in multiple environments, for hiding harm done to children, harm done to staff, and then using spiritual gifts or “spiritual pedigrees” to justify that they were just “tired or weak in the moment” and that they thought they’d handle it in house privately!
 
Well, to speak bluntly and boldly,
this fakery and denial is just all hogwash
when the gaslighting and lying starts!
 
 
We have to call it what it is!
It’s called spiritual abuse (SA) or clergy sexual abuse. (CSA) .
 
Returning to my original introduction regarding the need for discernment versus suspicion, we have to be very wise and make sure that our hearts are right as we begin to walk out these very difficult times of exposure as well as needing to be vocal.
 
There are victims among us who have not said anything for years about the things that took place in back rooms or offices or church buildings, camps or cars. For some reason, people run to suspicion and say, “Why are you now just beginning to talk about this? Why did you wait so long? What do you want out of this?”  
 
In legal terms when someone speaks out immediately about sexual abuse or harm done,the term is called “Outcry”.
They “cry out”, they “tell”.
 
When someone takes awhile to be able to process abuse, especially children (male, and female!) or young vulnerable teenagers or women who have been abused in the past, and have been threatened to remain silent or paid off to be quiet, and are easily preyed upon by those who are able to spot vulnerability, it takes them longer, and healthy unpacking and dialog frees them to tell. This must be tenderly and wisely handled with a skilled CHRISTIAN trauma counselor who works in these areas of sexual, church or cult abuse, or child abuse.
 
The term for this, when someone takes so long or doesn’t remember everything that happened (because they’ve been threatened and they have shut it out), this is called “Delayed Outcry.”
 
With the proper counseling and the proper police reporting involved, then there becomes an investigation or a forensic investigation that listens to and  reviews documents, the stories or events, does the investigating, looks at any kind of proof which could be documents, notes, texts, emails, pictures, clothing, the location or rooms these things happened in. Then, they begin to question and cross examine those who are being accused.
 
Yes! There have been people who have lied and set others up for something they never did. Or, they lured people into getting them to be involved in nefarious behaviors, use of drugs, alcohol, inappropriate touching, looking at unsafe objects, videos or pictures, and then turn around and use it to project onto that individual in order to hide their own very Addictive sicknesses.
 
Here’s the Honest Deal.
When there are wolves operating the pulpits, we don’t say, “well they were once a really nice sheep so we have to be nice to them!” A wolf is a wolf! A wolf puts on a mask like a sheep and can appear saintly and beautiful and tell sad, well oiled stories about themselves to make themselves look like they’re repentant over something “small” that they may struggle over and then everyone feels like, “what a lovely, humble soul!”
They can con, they can cry, they can preach, they can look compassionate. They can talk a good line, they can be very convincing.
But, if they have been predators, touching children, often touching women, touching men, plagiarizing, mishandling funds for their own purposes and lavish living...
…These are wolves.
 
We have to call them for what they are. They thrive on building their egos and are very convincing in order build their own empires, claiming that it was the Lord giving them all the blessings.  
 
2 Corinthians 11:13-14 addresses this so strongly!
“For such men are false apostles, deceitful workmen, disguising themselves as apostles of Christ.
And no wonder, for even Satan disguises himself as an angel of light!”
 
Friends, Discernment is at an all-time low
and the Lord is bringing it to the forefront.
 
The Spirit of God is saying to you and saying to me, “cultivate develop and train yourself to be discerning and to test everything!”
This means school boards, politicians, those in the pulpit, those in other ministries and any other position of authority.
Some of the slickest and most well promoted people are often those of who have charming, manipulative narcissistic traits and harm many in their wake.
 
The posture of power, inflated titles, fake tears, swiftly changing of trends and movements that claim it’s “THE thing” God is doing, are lures to draw crowds, train people to trust the speakers to hear from God for them ( but not fully train the audience to discern and judge.)
 
Oh the wretched and unbelievably twisted things I have heard behind the doors of Pastoral counseling!
Oh the ugly and extremely uncomfortable things I’ve witnessed in Green rooms before live “Christian” broadcasts.
Oh the unbelievably huge complex and disgusting competition that goes on among ministries and Christian organizations, when monetary policies are used as a way to enrich those at the top.
 
If There’s Anything I’d Scream From the Rooftops Today
It Would Be,
“Cultivate and Learn Discernment!”  
Be sober! Be wise!
Be accountable!”  
Oh Lord Jesus! Mature your people. Teach them to hear your voice. 
 
I would like to share a statement from a wonderful man of God who is a seasoned Husband, Father, Pastor, Speaker, and Author.
His name is Tim Challies.
He shares these very potent and deep words.
 
“With discernment comes division.  
A person who seeks to be discerning must be willing to suffer the effects of this division.
It will divide not only the believer from the unbeliever, but it may even divide a discerning believer from one who is undiscerning.
It will separate the mature from the immature and the naïve from the prudent.”
 
SO well said!
 
In my closing out of this podcast today, I would like to share a few potent words from Dr. Diane Langberg who has worked in multicultural and many international settings were abuse and tragedy of every kind, (those imagined and those that you cannot imagine that have taken place).
She works as a specialist among those who have been traumatized by Church abuse in its many forms. She is a wise Senior woman who I greatly admire and have learned much from.
As I share her statements in closing, allow them to speak to the deeper part of you where the Lord is developing discernment and greater awareness.
 
Diane says,
“Many of us have confused the church system with Jesus Christ; they are not the same.
There are wolves among the sheep, tares among the wheat.
Jesus called humans that looked good on the outside, white-washed tombs full of stink. My work has taught me that many poor sheep have followed a blind guide, a gifted wolf, and landed in a pit.
No so-called Christian system is truly God’s work unless it “fleshes out” his character. Toleration of sin, pretense, and crookedness do not reveal the character of God, even if they bear his name.
Arrogance is never godly.
Covering up sin is never godly.
Abuse of power is never godly.
Shepherds who feed on sheep are abusive.
Leadership that preserves and protects the system, rather than the people, turns the house of God into a safe place for predators.
Those who come to feed on God himself then find themselves being the main course instead.
 
We have failed to protect leaders from their own bondage to self-deception and sin. Exposure brings hope, for it brings the cancer to the light.
To hide sin by cover-up or silent complicity is spiritual abuse.
It is a failure to love the perpetrator. Demise of a system—even a spiritual system—is not the worst that can happen!
We must acknowledge and tell the truth about these things.
Great damage is being done to God’s sheep, in his name.
He weeps over such leaders and the sheep they harm.
Be watchful.
Recognize coercive and manipulative behavior.
Call it by its right name when someone in power uses spiritual words and ideas to silence, control, and intimidate.
Be discerning about those who hold power—including yourself.
Do not be deceived. 
May we, with Daniel, call out to God: “O Lord, hear! O Lord forgive. O Lord listen and act. For your own sake do not delay, because your church and your people are called by your name.”(Dan. 9:19).
Source:  https://erlc.com/resource/when-the-sheep-are-preyed-upon/
 
Finally, I would like to say these words.
Trauma can leave people feeling shattered and alone.
But through our faith, we discover that God’s love is unwavering and His healing touch can mend even the deepest wounds.
 
Let’s remember that we are not defined by our pain,
But by the Grace that lifts us up,
and leads us toward restoration.
 
If you find yourself carrying the weight of trauma, know that you are not alone on this journey.
For those of you who may be trembling with fear or who have experienced any kind of abuse.
For those of you, how are trembling and fear, because you know you have done something and have hidden it from others or have protected others who you know have done harmful, evil things, the word of God says to confess your faults to one another to confess your sins so that you may be clean, freed, and that you may be forgiven.
To those of you who have been abused, don’t be afraid to find a safe, godly, skilled trauma counselor who will be able to help you be freed from the prisons of shame, control, and intimidation within, so that you can walk in the light of grace and freedom and know that your Father in heaven has rescued you from those that harm.
To help you in your journey, I have included a link where you can quickly locate or begin to research a Christian counselor who is skilled and able to help you with whatever specific area that you may need to have help with.
https://tinyurl.com/5h4zfc9u
 
Let's pray together before we end this time together.
Heavenly Father,
May everyone who knows your mercy keep putting their trust in you, for they can count on you for help no matter what.
O Lord, you will never, no, never, neglect those who come to you."
-Psalms 9:10
Heavenly Father, in the face of fear and uncertainty, I call upon your strength to fill those who are listening to, or who are reading this message, fill them with courage.
When the wounds of traumatic experiences seem too deep to overcome, remind them that you are the ever-present help in times of trouble.
Grant them the bravery to face their fears head-on, knowing that you go in front of them, leading them into a future, free from the shackles of the past.
Thank you for being our fortress and our deliverer. With you by their side, They will not be afraid. Amen.
 
Duplication and sharing of this writing is welcomed,
as long as the complete message, Website, podcast link
and information for Mary Lindow is included.
Thank You!
"2025"
"THE MESSENGER"  -  Mary Lindow
www.marylindow.com
www.marylindow.podbean.com
 
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"TRAUMATIC TIMES AND TRUTH TELLERS"

By Mary Lindow
 
Today’s podcast is going to be discussing a subject that a lot of people avoid because they honestly just don’t know how to approach it or, they are afraid to approach it.
Somehow people think that people like myself who have been serving in ministry to the Body of Christ for many, many years, and who are called by the Lord to operate or flow in a prophetic ministry as well, do this 40 hours a week. And, of course, people do expect you to be on call and ready to deliver a clear and concise word from the Lord, without considering the fact that you are not just simply a prophet or a teacher/minister, but you are also a human being who lives and breathes and moves and feels.
 
BEING IN MINISTRY ON ANY LEVEL IS NOT FOR THE WEAK OF HEART and truly should not be something to be considered or pursued by those who are looking for a platform for fame or to hold power over others. It is a call to hear the voice of the Lord, to study his word and to always be ready to give a good report of what he has promised or what he is requiring of his people.
So having said that, I am echoing the words and most likely also the thoughts of many disappointed and disillusioned believers right now.
I read a wonderful devotional last week from the Bible app. and it so resonated with where things are right now in our world.
It said, 
“If we are paying attention, we will see a lot of “off” around us. I bet you have noticed things that appeared unjust. Cracks in the façade that show injustice is real.
People hurt. Bullies winning.
The right action is left undone or the wrong action brings harm.
When we pay attention, we have to acknowledge this world is gut-wrenchingly broken.”
 
Many of us will read a description of mistreatment and nod along from experience, memories bringing a fire to our chest. Others hear words about injustice, and it all feels distant. The deep desire to downplay evil stirs, perhaps even subconsciously.
Reading Habakkuk beckons us to acknowledge a foundational principle God reveals through Old Testament prophets—you have to see the evil. We must look around at what is happening in the world and see it for what it is.”
 
THE BIBLE PAINTS THE PROPHETS AS THOSE WHO JOLT US AWAKE AND FORCE US TO SEE WHAT IS HAPPENING AND WHAT GOD SAYS ABOUT SUCH THINGS.
 
They are the watchmen signaling with waving arms, often to people wanting to look away.
“Look up and see the evil done against others”, the prophets said.
See the impact of your own choices on the vulnerable.
See the disobedience of God’s people.
 
GOD SEES THE WAYS WE’VE GOTTEN THINGS SUPER WRONG FRIENDS, and he’s coming to do something about it.
Get ready. We might not be paying attention, but he is.
 
It would be easy for some of us—and beneficial at times—to look away from the wrong done around us. We much prefer the aesthetics that way. Yet, there are consequences to indifference. We should not be surprised by discipline from the Lord if we choose not to pay attention to the discrepancy between our community’s actions and God’s righteous standard, just as the prophets warned in Israel.
 
FOR OVER 16 YEARS STEVE AND I HAVE ALSO BEEN INVOLVED AS PASTORAL COUNSELORS. Now, some individuals say that all pastors can give pastoral counseling to people. It’s a little different than that. Some people go to school and study psychology, which is the study of the mind, and how to understand the psyche of people and help them. This is a secular approach, and there have been good results and helping people resolve conflicts and often mental illness issues as well as addressing dementia and Alzheimer’s problems and more.
 
Pastoral counseling is where the Bible is the foundation, the Scriptures are the foundation of what you use as a basis to advise and counsel and hopefully help restore people. You also do have to take study courses and apply different techniques in counseling that assist you in being able to assess and discern, as well as understand some issues of mental health in order to be integral in your approach. Steve and I were supervised for over 15 years by a doctor of psychology, who was a strong believer, and we both took courses from different Christian counseling associations and college courses in order to broaden our ability to help people. We also had a brick-and-mortar counseling group with a dear friend, our friend who was the doctor of psychology and the practice supervisor for three years in our local area.
 
WE SAW THE LORD TRANSFORM, marriages, families, young people, and drug addicts, as well as dealing with many abused believers who had come out of almost cult-like, churches, or who were involved in environments and churches where they could not talk about abuse going on with the staff. Many in ministry callings came to us to share their hearts and gained helpful counsel as well.
 
LITERALLY A FEW WEEKS BEFORE COVID LOCKDOWNS BEGAN, our landlord who was also a believer let us know that he was going to sell his portion of the medical unit building that we were renting from him, and the Lord had begun to speak to Steve and I about the timing of where we were supposed to head into more private work as pastoral counselors and as mentors within that same timeframe. The state of Colorado had begun to dictate what licensed counselors were permitted to address, absolutely mandating that they were not permitted to talk about any kind of therapy, that assisted those with “different sexual lifestyles” if they wanted to be transformed or helped.
 
Steve and I strictly operate as Ordained ministers so we do not have to bow our knee to the dictates of a corrupt government licensure program.  We still have to follow confidentiality laws as well as report any kind of devastating child abuse that we may hear in our counseling sessions, but it is all done ethically and legally, and with grace. When the lockdowns began the majority of our work took place over the phone or occasional zoom sessions. With great sadness our dear sister and friend and Counseling Center Supervisor Dr. Muskie, passed into heaven, due to complications with WuhanCovid19.
 
When You Counsel People, The Number One Thing
That Needs To Be Absolutely Evident Is That You Are Willing
To NOT Look At Everyone From A Lens Of What YOU Know,
But Rather From The Lens Of God’s Compassion, As Well As
Leaning In To The Discernment Of The Holy Spirit.
 
The majority of the people I work with are women who have been in abusive environments with either husbands, abusive parents or/siblings and with people in ministry environments (and I’m telling you there are many sexual predators who prey upon women right in church buildings!) as well as working with professional women who are pressured by men and women in their work environments.
 
There are also a lot of women who are very sensual, who get attention by teasing men hoping to cause them to fall. It’s a real deal! And they don’t just go after pastors. They will go after any man in a local body or church or work environment to get the attention that they hunger for when they missed out on being parented properly, or if they feel that something sensual makes them get the attention they need to feel loved. This often happens when there has been sexual abuse in their lives.
 
Pastoral counseling is based on getting to the root of the problem according to what the word of God says, and for a believer the importance of it is that we are willing to face the root cause of what causes us to be traumatized, bitter, secretive, or lie.
 
ONE OF THE HARDEST THINGS TO COUNSEL IS A PERSON WITH AN EXTREMELY HARD, WOUNDED HEART, OR WHO IS EMBITTERED. No matter how much you try to show them the way and soften the pathway for them with the grace of God, there is often a back lash that always has a reason to explain why they are hurt, why they are hard, and why they choose to stay stuck in a hard place.
In Matthew 13:15 Jesus says:
“For the heart of this people has become hard,
With their ears they scarcely hear,
And they have closed their eyes,
Otherwise they would see with their eyes,
Hear with their ears,
And understand with their heart and return,
And I would heal them.”
 
It is a humbling thing to admit that you are stuck or that you are in a hard place, or that you are dominant and mean and cruel to people because you are bitter over tough life circumstances that have happened to you, and so you put up a wall to protect yourself.
 
I have met Christians who justify the fact that they can bully and name call and yes, often swear at other people when they think they are trying to help them or advise them. They often get angry when they are confronted about their bad bullying behavior towards their children. If you ever hear a believer say something like “my child is a jerk”, or “you’re a little brat”, or “stop whining and get up or I’m going to give you something to cry about”, you can tell that there’s verbal abuse going on in their home.
 
Verbal abuse isn’t just cussing at someone although it is verbal abuse for sure! Verbal abuse is considered shaming, humiliating, paralyzing, and dominating over someone else verbally to the point that they are caused to emotionally shut down in fear. Unfortunately, I hear in the confines and confidential pouring out of hearts in my counseling sessions many who have been yelled at with scripture verses and shamed over not being perfect and obedient to God.  This is called spiritual abuse.
 
Picking out specific Bible verses, and using them as a battering ram, or a knife that stabs into the heart of someone to get them to “obey" or to get them to “submit”, is absolutely vicious behavior and it is abusive. There’s no godly virtue in posturing to be a big shot, or to appear to be the person who can control a room with snarky snide remarks or a bunch of advice that everyone is forced to listen to.
 
This is called "insolent pride" in the Bible, and we always take that biblical view, but in the natural if you were studying a psychological viewpoint, this is called narcissism.
 
Proverbs 21:24 states
“Proud,” “Haughty,” “Scoffer,” are his names, 

He who acts with insolent pride
 
 
INSOLENT PRIDE CREATES A SCOFFING, ARROGANT “KNOW IT ALL” ENVIRONMENT, where there is no ability to ever address the deep-rooted issue of control and abuse in a human being and how they use it towards others to posture. The need for power and control becomes “out of control”! But underneath that simmering rage there is someone who needs to keep everything tightly organized and under their thumb in order that no one finds about out the secret part of them that is either weak, wounded, or has done something they should not do to harm others.
 
WHY AM I SHARING THIS?
Well, we are living in a time where narcissism is actually applauded and stroked as a point of near genius! Insolent pride and verbal domination have become the way of communication in most social media groups.  And, unfortunately it takes place in a lot of texting where people can say cruel or snarky things behind the protection of a telephone screen and slander others in one mass social media post or text! But to say it face-to-face and see the pain in someone’s face by the words they’ve spoken is a different thing isn’t it? And the other party suddenly being painted as a “rotten person” never gets a chance to tell the side of their story that may actually be the truth.
 
Every day we come across people who need to hear a kind word, who need to be lead to a place where they can get help or truth, or just simply be treated with a level of empathy.  And, every day we come across people who may be predators, verbal abusers, spiritual abusers, and have no conscience about how they treat people.
 
IT IS ABSOLUTELY TIME FOR THE BODY OF CHRIST AGAIN TO READDRESS THE ISSUE, FOR THE NEED FOR EXTREME DISCERNMENT. Everything that the enemy could throw at us and our children is on full display right now, and if we dumb down safety and sexuality, safety and what our children watch on television or other tech devices, safety and what WE as adults watch, we simply embrace the narrative of the world, and we move away from scriptural goodness into a place that pollutes the ability to have good discernment.
 
When we don’t allow accountability to come into our lives, whether it be with a good and wise counselor, or with a group of trusted friends who are not going to take your information and spread it far and wide, we leave ourselves open to a secretive fantasy world, or a secret world of torment.
 
What do you do when you’re anxious or sad or depressed or fearful over the way your husband treats you or the way your wife beats you down verbally?
 
What do you do when you are at a stalemate because a spouse refuses to forgive or move forward into hearing the truth about some of the things they have done to get locked into bad behavior and resentment?
 
What do you do when you have a child that suddenly has become addicted to video games and it’s moved up into their adult life and they have no friends because their world is all in front of a screen?
 
What do you do when you know that a minister or a member of a staff in a church or a CEO of your corporation is secretly sexually preying upon individuals in their offices, and you could lose your job, because you know?
 
THESE ARE THE THINGS THAT ARE HARD TO ADDRESS,
BUT MUST BE ADDRESSED!
 
The world is feeling a tremendous amount of being unsettled right now by the great upset of realizing how easy it is to be controlled by a few tyrants, and yet people will cower and go about in denial, instead of learning how to be strong in the Lord, and in the power of his might.
 
I have worked with many brave women, who have prayed and fasted and done everything they possibly can to help work on their marriages, but their spouses have chosen to hunker down and gaslight and punish. No matter what approach is taken they become more verbally violent and are determined to blame everyone else.
 
Is this easy to talk about? Absolutely not!
But when you are scripturally based not only as a minister, but also as a pastoral counselor, you must bring truth into the light and help people become free from abusive environments and often “self abusive” environments.  You must above all have confidentiality and trust level that they know will not be breached. Most pastoral counselors work on a sliding scale fee in order to keep their rates low for those who are working hard, sometimes two and three jobs, or a wife who has limited income because her husband tightly holds the reins of the finances.
 
WHEN YOU’RE A PASTORAL COUNSELOR, IT IS DONE OUT OF THE PASSION FOR CHRIST and therefore money and income are not the foremost driving purpose for your work. But, there must be an investment and a fee from those who are in counseling, or people tend to not take it seriously.
It needs to be considered per individual and what they are capable of handling. I often tell people their counseling is much more important than the two or three times weekly custom cup of coffee at their local coffee shop, or perhaps snacks in their afternoon candy bar routine. It really isn’t a sacrifice when you start doing the work to get yourself whole and healthy.
It becomes a lifetime investment.
 
Pastoral counseling is definitely a calling and not to be simply a moneymaker. However, many individuals still expect hours and hours of free counseling time, and rarely invest much into changing their lives if there isn’t some kind of financial accountability for them. Of course if you attend a local church and there is a counseling pastor on staff, that’s what they are there for! If you regularly go to that fellowship and support them, usually there is an option or opportunity for you to see a counselor on staff for no fee. But having experienced some of this in the past, I also know that people tend to jump from counselor to counselor or, Pastor to Pastor if they don’t want to deal with the root cause of their problems, and it can cause friction in a local body if there’s not respect for the position and the role the pastoral counselor is assigned to, by the Lord. Basically they want someone to justify what they are doing, and their bad behaviors.
 
I URGE YOU TO ASK THE LORD TO WALK THE CORRIDORS OF YOUR HEART. Are there things in your life that you dominate and hold over others as scriptural and “legalistic absolutes” and they have become nearly abusive because you refuse to listen to someone else’s heart on the matter?
 
One thing that I have often observed is that people become very hard and hardened because they want to win an argument, or something that has helped and changed them, becomes a law for them to use against others.
 
Now, before others think I’m going to lighten my approach to the Bible, understand this. The word of God is perfect and enlightens the soul. It brings truth to a matter and it does not waver.
 
Of course, there are absolutes in the Scriptures that God will not deviate from no matter how many people try to dilute or maneuver around them. But if we use a hammer and verbal abuse and shame and scripture to “scorch people” in order to prove a point, or to advise them then we are also biblically unsound and abusive.
 
FIRST CORINTHIANS INSTRUCTS US SO CLEARLY THAT LOVE IS WHAT?
It is patient.
It is kind.
It is not boastful, it is not arrogant, and it is not self-serving.
 
When the Lord said, come to me, all of you who are heavy, laden, weighed down and burdened, and I will give you rest, he meant that, because he knows we get heavy laden and burdened and weighed down, either by our own destructive behaviors and sins, or by the destructive behaviors and actions and sins of others.
 
There is also nothing more painful than when someone is in pain or sorrowful or going through a great loss or trauma, and another individual shouts, “get over it, move on”, or cracks jokes about the person in pain.
 
Yes, you will be around people who are chronically in pain or depressed, and it takes patience. It takes guidance, and it takes kindness to either help direct them to help, or gently tell them that you are not the person that is able to help them at this time, but that you will stop and pray for them right now. 
You see, it takes humility.
 
Although there is a lot of reading material produced that uses the term “tough love” and a lot of books about boundaries that we can study, remember, if you’re coming from a scriptural perspective the ultimate goal of God is a Redemptive moment or a restoration if possible.
 
BOUNDARIES ARE NOT TO BE HUGE CEMENT WALLS WITH BARBED WIRE AT THE TOP BLOCKING OUT EVEN THE SUN.
 
Boundaries as a believer are there for when there is a conflict or a disagreement or a different viewpoint with another person. It’s a  "time out" to go and think about it, to pray about it, check your own heart and see if there’s something that would bring about a form of reconciliation.  And then, you try to come together and discuss the issue.
You can agree to disagree and not banish people!
 
Imagine how much Jesus disagrees with a lot of how we behave and yet he doesn’t banish us! He continues to wait for us to come out of our corners of hiding or corners of denial, and meet him again in dialogue until light comes and hope and help, bring a different perspective on our pathway of life.
 
I have worked with people through phone counseling sessions from many different places in the United States, and I have seen them grieve and open up and trust me with the deepest of their painful sorrows and things that are unbelievably sometimes even unbearable to mention. Slowly, but surely, a foundation of nurture and truth combined begins to chip away at the lie that they have believed and feel viewed as something no longer valuable or useful, or that they are worthy of value and are not to be abused!
 
For instance, if a young girl has been used and trafficked by a parent for most of their childhood and up into their high school years, once they awaken to this later in life, there is no way that anyone can accuse them of “choosing” to not face it!
 
There comes a time where the light of God shines brightly on the pain and the sorrow, and they need to be led out into a place where they can express the grief, the anguish and the huge loss of childhood innocence, and yet be brought to a safe place before the face of God, through strategic dialog, planning, or behavioral changes. Gently addressing the people that they affiliate, with until they see the light and the kindness of God. Until they can see themselves as the original creation God had planned them to be.
 
NOW, DON’T GET ME WRONG.
I ABSOLUTELY LOVE WHEN THE LORD OPENS DOORS FOR ME TO SPEAK AND MINISTER, and if so called to, I to do operate in the word of knowledge and the word of wisdom when I am involved in these environments.  It is hard work to study and prepare in prayer for when you are assigned these opportunities to speak and minister publicly. But, this behind-the-scenes work of mentoring and pastorally, biblically guide people with counsel, is one of the hardest things that I think I’ve ever done, and yet the most joyful and rewarding when you see the lights come on and the light enter and the chains of the enemy become literal paper and fall away. The person finds the joy and laughter and finds that God has a glorious plan for them.
 
Sometimes it can be a rather rapid process, but the majority of times it is a steady, consistent work, until they find their wings and fly. Every time I work with someone I think about how long it takes for Jesus to help us to find our way, and he often narrows the path of our relationships and friendships in order for us to not only be safe, but to also be on a pathway that is not crowded by those who choose to not do the work that God is asking them to do, in order to be transformed.
 
If we look at the parable where the seed falls on the ground, there are those who will stay stony hearted and will not take in water. They will not receive nourishment. They choose not to grow, and the sad thing is that their seed is pecked up on my other predators.
 
I CAN TELL YOU HONESTLY THAT ALL OF THE PROPHETIC WORDS SPOKEN OVER YOUR LIFE DO NOT CHANGE
THE HARD WORK IT TAKES TO GET YOUR LIFE ON A PATH WHERE THEY CAN COME TO PASS.
 
The Lord is so good to give us future promises, but with those there’s a requirement for action.
Don’t wait until things are so bad and you have a minefield of heartache and debris left in your wake that you have to now clean up.
Don’t be afraid to ask for the help that you need, and find someone whom you can work with and feel safe with, and get on with allowing God to create a new clean heart and renew a right spirit within you.
 
If you have addictions to pornography or addictions to drugs or any other thing that causes you to feel driven towards it, the Lord wants to offer you freedom and restore you to a place of peace and no longer walking in fear.
 
The greatest counselor that we can have is the Holy Spirit; the scripture says the Holy Spirit is a counselor.
Now, many people say, “Well!  I can hear from the Lord for myself, and I will let the Holy Spirit counsel me!”
The problem with that statement is that if we are already in trouble, or we are hiding something, or we have been abused and beat down, we can often dismiss the deep inner voice of the Lord telling us that we need to talk to others and be accountable and get help. Often the Holy Spirit will gently say to someone,  “Go talk to so-and-so or go talk to your pastor or go talk to a counselor or a close friend, who is wise”. Yet pride or fear keeps us paralyzed and afraid to move forward.
 
EVERYONE SOMEWHERE IN THEIR FAMILY OR IN THEIR LIFE EXPERIENCES HURT, AND PAIN AND TRAUMA. Unfortunately, this is the nature of fallen man and the Earth is riddled with devastation because of it. But in John 10:10, Jesus himself said, “I have come that you might have life to the fullest!” He said that you MIGHT have life to the fullest! And the first part of that verse is, “but Satan comes to rob to steal to kill and destroy”. This is what happens to people in life when they are abused and traumatized! 
 
Jesus offers a hand to us saying come to me all of you, who are very weary and heavy laden, heavy burdened, and I will give you rest so that you might have life to the fullest.
 
One of the simplest ways you can find help is to simply look in your area for a Christian counselor, and you can even ask for specifics and details. Those who are really dedicated to the call of God as pastoral counselors spend as much time in prayer and preparation before there counseling session, as they do IN the counseling session.
 
The word of God ultimately has the answers that we need, and the pathway that will guide us out of darkness into the light.
 
I AM IMPRESSED TO SHARE THIS PODCAST SPECIFICALLY
BECAUSE I KNOW THERE ARE THOSE OF YOU
THAT ARE LISTENING WHO ARE CRYING OUT FOR GOD
TO SHOW YOU WHERE TO GO OR WHAT TO DO ABOUT
SOME OF THE SITUATIONS YOU FIND YOURSELF IN.
 
He wants you to know it is not wrong to seek help and that counseling is not of the devil!
 
After all the scripture in Isaiah calls, Jesus, The Mighty Counselor! And again he speaks of the Holy Spirit as being our advocate, or one of our counselors, because they are in themselves three in one with the Father. But, the Lord gives the spirit of counsel and wisdom, and insight to those who are called to help others out of dark places.
 
Don’t hesitate!
Call someone, research someone in your area, or if you have a pastor or individual who is skilled in your church to help you deal with the specific kind of trauma upset you are dealing with, make an appointment and step forward. Not all pastors are skilled or qualified to help people who have been through traumatic sexual abuse issues, or who are dealing with parents who have dementia and Alzheimer’s. But, they can certainly pray with you and help also to direct you to the proper resource.
 
JESUS WANTS US TO FIND A PLACE OF PEACE AND REST IN HIM. His ultimate is to bring us peace and to draw us close to him.
 
If there’s anyone who has ever shamed you by telling you that, seeing a counselor is weak or shows that you don’t trust the Lord, just understand that that individual is also hiding something, or is extremely bound up in the fear of being led astray.
 
Some counselors are not a good fit and so you go to a different one! There have been times when I have worked with individuals and I have to lovingly let them know that I am not a good fit for their situation, or it becomes overlapped into situations where there needs to be another specialist who can better help them walk out an area where they’re stuck, and they need a Focused, Skilled individual to help them unpack, and unburden the deep pain that they are in.
 
THE SCRIPTURE SAYS HE WHOM THE SON SETS FREE IS FREE INDEED.
My prayer for those that are listening today is that you will open your heart to the Lord in prayer and ask him to help you to take the steps forward that you might need to deal with whatever it is that you are suffering over.
 
If you have been verbally abused by bullies in the church or those that may even say that they have some form of counseling skill, but they verbally abuse or shame or use harsh language in order to shock you, this was not the way God planned it. Try again!
 
Step forward one more time and ask the Lord to open the door for you to the right counselor. He will do it, and he will help you be free from pain, the hiding of abuse as a child, the difficulty of dealing with addicted or angry adult children, and those that are prodigal parents, or prodigal children.
 
Jesus has a plan and helping us to hand things over to him in his care when we’ve done all that we know we can possibly do, and we have apologized or repented for actions on our part.
 
Remember, nothing is impossible with God.
I have seen him turn situations around that seemed absolutely impossible! He can help us to stand firm in our faith and not hide in order to be people pleasers, or to cower under the pressure of abusive treatment.
 
OUR NATURAL HUMAN RESPONSE TO SHAME IS TO HIDE.
We hide from each other and hide from God.
This has been the case since Creation. The Bible describes how the first human beings responded to God when they had sinned and were ashamed:  “Then the man and his wife heard the sound of the Lord God as he was walking in the garden in the cool of the day, and they hid from the Lord God among the trees of the garden” (Genesis 3:8).
 
FRIENDS, HIDING KEEPS US FROM HEALING.
Let’s all aim to be a compassionate, courageous community of believers. A community in which we support each other as we choose healing over hiding.
Let’s support each other as we ask God to grow, to change and heal us.
 
Let Me Lift You Up To The Father In Prayer Right Now:
Father, I thank you for those that are listening to this podcast today. I know it’s not an easy one and certainly not as stimulating and supernatural or as exciting as some, but it IS a supernatural work that you do when you bring us to a place of releasing pain and telling the truth about what has happened to us, or where we have done something to harm someone else.
 
Lord, I know you’re doing a great cleansing work and that you are starting with the body of Christ, bringing your judgment and your truth, and your light.
 
Lord, you said the days are coming when we will worship you in spirit and in truth. Lord, we can’t fully worship you when we’re not truthful with you, if we’re hiding and if we’re cloaking, so I pray that anyone listening today. Father anyone who is afraid. I pray that you tell them that fear is holding them back and that you would guide them literally by the hand and direct them to the proper counselor, to someone who has the wisdom to help unlock the pain, the history, the stories and the trauma that has happened to them, in war, in family, in abuse in school or a job. With an abusive Pastor, with an abusive Sunday school teacher.
 
The list goes on and on and you know every one of these events.
So Father I ask that those that are hearing this message will take courage. You will GIVE them the courage to step out and ask for help and I know you will do it.
 
You will help them if they will simply step out, and I thank you for hearing this prayer from my heart for them, in Jesus name.
 
 
Duplication and sharing of this writing is welcomed, as long as the complete message, Website, podcast link and information for Mary Lindow is included.
Thank You! 2024
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"WEAPONIZED WORDS" - When The World Grows Harsh, What Does God Say?

By Mary Lindow
This message just"might" hit close to home.  
I have been thinking a lot this week about arrogance and those finger pointing individuals who enjoy belittling others and simply love to be plain old snarky. Just look at the headlines of newspapers, Internet news and gossip columns! With the stroke of a key or two, words written imply things that can break hearts, ruin trust, hope, National Security and relationships.
THERE IS SUCH A HARSH STING TO THE HEART  
WHEN THE CRUEL WORDS OF SOMEONE ELSE INTENTIONALLY 
DOES A VERBAL SLAP DOWN OR SHAMES YOU.
Usually it occurs when THEY believe that THEY are absolutely right or have "superior" knowledge, and that others are the "lesser" and are the "wrong- big- dummies".
This mean and sour arrogance, which uses power to belittle or harm others, is something that crushes and cripples hearts and dreams. It's a secret and deep seething storm inside of the soul of those who feel they have rights and superior thinking that justifies weaponizing words. Yes... Weaponizing! 
Words can deliver pinpoint missiles of pain, threats, ridicule, humiliation, subtle undertones of condescension but can also deliver payloads of healing, warmth, gratitude, encouragement, and above all, Hope.
As a believer, our faith should not be arrogant, nor should a person of faith belittle others! We should never use our faith or intelligence to pretend that we are superior or more informed than others! NO! NEVER!
Belittling is a form of bullying! It's when someone makes you feel as though you are little, minuscule, not good enough.
Proverbs 11:17 says,"Your own soul is nourished when you are kind, but you destroy yourself when you are cruel".
Arrogance is the opposite of humility, and humility is supposed to be a Christian virtue.  Jesus Christ who, in coming into the world and living and dying alongside of us, lived out what humility is.
You will never reach the place of honor or full use by the Heavenly Father, (and can actually be disqualified from many opportunities) until your insecurities and need to needle, belittle, compete with, or shame others is addressed, repented of and buried! And, when mentioning, reaching a place of honor I'm referring to this as honor before the face and rule of God.
If your goals in life are to have men honor you first...
...You will be one who certainly tramples others with your words.
 
Those who have the sickness of pride in their hearts, speak of others weakness and sins with contempt, irritation, frustration, or judgment. Pride is crouching inside of your meanness and belittling of the struggles of others.
It's cowering in your jokes about the "craziness" of your spouse, the mocking of that "too sensitive friend". It may even be lurking in the prayers we throw upward for our friends that are "subtly or not" often tinted with the color of exasperated irritation.
Listen to Proverbs 15:4 from The Message translation.
"Kind words heal and help;
Cutting words wound and maim."
 
Sometimes, we use sarcasm to voice harsh, or cutting words we otherwise would not say, often intentionally hurting others. Once the pain is inflicted however, we retreat, saying, "Oh, I was just kidding!"  But the sting of those words hurts so much that those we have injured, withdraw.
Our words don't feel like jokes at all.
Jesus' words should be a warning to those of us who are tempted to use sarcasm as a weapon:
"But I tell you that men will have to give account on the day of judgment for every careless word they have spoken". -Matthew 12:36
 
SARCASTIC REMARKS USUALLY SEEM LIKE NO BIG DEAL  
TO THE PERSON WHO MAKES THEM. 
BUT TO THE RECIPIENT, THOSE WORDS MAKE LASTING IMPRESSIONS
THAT SCAR TO THE VERY CORE OF THE HEART.
 
Many times, sarcasm shames a person, causing them to feel belittled and unworthy. When shame takes root in the heart, it can cause disastrous behavior, because the person now feels worthless and seeks desperately to find anything that will make them feel otherwise.
Shaming others is a serious offense with serious consequences. 
Jesus said, "Your very words will be used as evidence against you,
and your words will declare you either innocent or guilty." 
 -Matthew 12:37
 
Are your words kind and constructive? 
Do they desire to seek peace and unity, or are they driven by your fleshy desire to sting, aggravate, retaliate, tease, belittle, control, alienate, shame and manipulate through sarcasm? YES ... alllll of those HURT PEOPLE!
The enemy is camping out at the gate of your every relationship. Children, spouse, boyfriend, girlfriend, parents, co-laborers and more. He is lurking around every corner, seeking to find that one open crevice where he can enter. If he has been entering in and camping out in your home or relationships through the use of sarcasm, it's time to boot this verbal enemy out and lock the gate behind him.
Die to your need to be snarky and always the one with a chirpy sarcastic comeback! Allow Christ to show you His ways that love, peace and compassion can be the source of every word that proceeds from your mouth.
"All of you, clothe yourselves with humility towards one another,
because, 'God opposes the proud but shows favor to the humble.
Humble yourself then! Bow low under God's mighty hand,
that he may use you to the fullest at the proper time.
-1 Peter 5:56
 
Prayer of Brokenness and Confession
(I Highly recommend praying this out loud.) 
Holy and All seeing Father God,
I confess now to You, that I do not always love my neighbor.
I confess that I have despised others, even to the point of hatred.
I confess that I have been hurt by others.
I confess that forgiveness and reconciliation at times are just impossible for us.
I realize that I have spoken words that have broken people or have humiliated them and although asking for forgiveness, they have distanced themselves from me, and rightly so because they don't want to take any more of my unkind words.
Father I ask you to heal them from the things that I have said that caused broken and crushed spirits. 
Restore them; bring them Friends that will treat them kindly.
I know that nothing is impossible in You.
So, I come to You, seeking healing and wholeness for myself.
Heal whatever is inside of me that needs to speak poorly of others, or to speak down to others.
Show me the parts of me that are insecure or needy. 
Help me, whenever possible, to live in peace with others, to seek reconciliation and healing and forgiveness.
For Your Son Jesus came and lived among us, and was betrayed and denied, abused and put to death.
Yet, He rose again, and came with the message of peace to those who had denied Him and abandoned Him. 
Oh Father! May I walk in His ways and model His kindness in my speech and actions.
I pray this in Jesus' loving name.
Amen.
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SOWING SEEDS AND DEEDS OF GREATNESS - MERCY

 
Then he  (Jesus) added,
"Now go and learn the meaning of this Scripture:
'I want you to show mercy, not offer sacrifices.'
For I have come to call not those who think they are righteous,
But those who know they are sinners."
Matthew 9:13
 
It has been said that after the French Revolution, a certain convict that was released on parole traveled the countryside in search of a new beginning. Being an ex-con, as you would expect, led to complications in this search, and he wound up at the gates of a clergyman who agreed to host him for the night.
The convict, as is well known, takes advantage of the bishop’s generosity: getting up early before dawn, he takes off with the bishop’s silver; his escape however is hindered by the local Police Inspector, who after seemingly catching him presents the presumed thief to the bishop for identification. The bishop, without missing a beat, covers for his sneaky guest and speaks such words of kindness over the convict’s past present and future, through releasing him even though caught red handed and deserving of further punishment.
His words? They were profound and dripped of Mercy.
 
"My friend, you forgot to take the candlesticks as well."
 
For those of you who are perhaps not familiar with the story about the convict/man and the priest I just spoke of, I am referring to Victor Hugo’s book “ Les Miserables.”
I think Victor Hugo shows something of the challenge of today’s Message of the Gospel that Jesus would want us each to hear and to act upon.
"Be merciful, as your Father is merciful." -Luke 6:36
 
NOBODY LIKES A BULLY OR TO BE TALKED DOWN TO.
Maybe it is easy for us to be merciful when we have the upper hand.  If someone comes begging for forgiveness, it becomes a show–of generosity of spirit, but a show nonetheless–that we are in some way better than that person. Picture elegant royals, who, moments before the execution of a criminal would decree their royal pardon, leaving a lasting impression of compassion upon those pleading for another chance.
 
THIS IS NOT THE WAY GODLY MERCY WORKS.
Oh how merciful is our Father! It’s not that our faults are not important to an immeasurable God. We have without a doubt deeply wounded the ties that bind us to him.
Yet he still holds out his hand, bloodied and deformed holes in them, created by the nails put in, even to his enemies.
 
TODAY JESUS INVITES US TO RE-EVALUATE OUR MERCY:
How deeply do I forgive those who offend me?
Do I pray for them, or allow my forgiveness to become a show of winning the upper hand?  (Another way of showing false humility.)
The forgiving priest not only forgave Jean Valjean’s theft, he created an excuse for him, and even gave away the last of his own treasure, in the hopes that Valjean would be able to start a new life, knowing that he was shown the purest of love and authentic mercy.
 
MERCY MEANS…
Empathy, pity, sympathy, understanding; favor, grace; benevolence, care, compassion, gentleness, goodness, goodwill, humaneness, kindliness, meekness, mildness, niceness, softness, tenderness; generosity, affection, devotion, love, worship
 
IT ALSO MEANS…
…Letting go of harshness, accusation, presuming you know better what others need in order for them to better serve God. When we act out like this, we become much like Javert the Police Inspector hounding and lording it over Jean Valjean, bent on making sure all deeds that do not measure up to our way of justice are fully dealt with.
He felt sure that God wanted him to be the individual who would measure out justice and harsh terms of punishment in order to break John Valejan, thus having him pay the price of his wickedness and perchance if once finally shattered and broken, he may perhaps have God look his way .
 
"DON'T GET MAD -- GET EVEN?”
This seems to be the usual way people view the world nowadays. We should be thankful that God takes a different view of things. Although the Bible makes it clear that God is the Great Judge who hates all evil doing, he is also the Merciful One, who forgives and accepts people who turn to him.
Occasionally God chooses not to grant us mercy; for the purpose of judgment, rebuke, discipline, or testing. Fortunately, for most of us, this is the exception, not the rule.  For the time being, God has shown incredible patience and mercy by withholding most of the effects of our sins.
I will have mercy, on whom I will have mercy,
And I will have compassion on whom I will have compassion."
Rom 9:15
 
 
GOD IS NOT ALWAYS SCOLDING US!
"He will not always chide: neither will he keep his anger forever."
Psalm 103:9
Could God find reasons to scold His children all the time? Indeed, He could! None of us are perfect. We could all do better.
However, as justified as scolding us would be, God realizes that we would easily be discouraged if all we ever heard was scolding.
When He scolds us He is correcting us so that we confess our sins and do better.
"The Lord All-Powerful says, “They belong to me; on that day they will be my very own.
As a parent shows mercy to his child who serves him, I will show mercy to my people."
Malachi 3:17
 
ASK GOD FOR THE HELP YOU NEED TO OVERCOME SIN.
Face the reality that much of the suffering in our fallen world is caused by human sin.   But count on the fact that God is merciful toward all sinners. Whenever you recognize a situation in which some of your own sin has contributed to your suffering, pray for help, and God will give you the strength you need to overcome sin. Stop holding onto any sinful secrets that have been causing guilt, shame and bitterness in your soul. Confess your sins specifically, repent of them, accept the forgiveness that God offers you, and embrace the power that God gives you to move forward into a better life.
 
LISTEN FOR GOD SPEAKING IN THE SILENCE.
When your suffering becomes so painful that you can’t make any sense of it or figure out how to endure it, you may feel as if you’re trapped in silence, since nothing that other people say or do to try to help actually breaks through to you. But when you’re at the point where you don’t hear anything else, you can actually hear God best, since you’re less likely to get distracted by the world’s noise around you. In the silence, pour out your thoughts and feelings to God in prayer, and then listen to what He has to say to you. God won’t shout, but He will whisper, to encourage you to keep drawing closer to Him.
 
SUFFERING IS ALL AROUND YOU IN THIS FALLEN WORLD.
Sometimes it’s so tragic that it’s heartbreaking. Yet, God promises that He is loving and merciful. How can you reconcile these two realities that seem like they compete against each other?
The key is to look for God’s mercy, even when it seems like it can’t exist with the suffering you encounter. God’s mercy is a stronger force than even the worst suffering, and when you look for it, you’ll find it.
The spirit, which he sent to live in us, wants us for him alone.
James 4:5
 
WE ARE GOD’S OWN.
LET US NOT BE AFRAID TO BE LIKE OUR FATHER.
 
Let our hearts be conduits of God’s mercy, knowing that we ourselves have been forgiven so very much.
Let us communicate our thanks to Him by being overflowing vessels of kind and tender expression, showing God’s mercy to all.
 
The Lord is kind and shows mercy.
He does not become angry quickly
But is full of love.
Psalm 145:8
 
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